A Shift of Focus
by AliceSarina
Summary: As Abby begins to think about what she wants in the future, her priorities shift. Perhaps a mutual attraction, which has always simmered beneath the surface of their friendship, can finally become something more. MCABBY! Complete! Now with more Fiber!
1. Chapter 1

**Title: A Shift of Focus**

**Description: Over their years working together, Abby and McGee have matured. As Abby begins to think about what she wants in the future, her priorities shift. Perhaps the mutual attraction, which has always simmered beneath the surface of their friendship can finally become something more.**

**Disclaimer: None of this belongs to me!**

**A/N: I like McAbby as a couple, but I know that right now that is something they just aren't ready for. This is my idea of how it could happen eventually.**

**I have used a combination of introspective writing and action writing, to keep things interesting, although the whole story remains in third person. **

**I have most of the story written, and it should be finished by the end of the week. I am planning on 4 substantial chapters. I am pretty happy with where it is going, that's why I am posting it. **

**Abby's POV**

**The Weekend**

Her brother's wedding had been perfect. He was so happy, and his new bride was absolutely glowing. Abby was overjoyed for them. But for the first time in her life she had been filled with longing to be a bride, to adore someone that much.

It dawned on her as she watched her brother and his wife-to-be pledge their forever-love and faithfulness, that she wanted a forever-man. She had dated many men, and she had connected with some of them deeply. She had even loved before. But she had never met anyone worth pledging her eternal devotion to. Truth be told, she wasn't even looking. She preferred to live her life moment by blissful moment. Maybe it was the fact that she was getting older, or maybe she was starting to realize how fleeting life really was, but she was starting to think about what she wanted for the future.

It was at the reception that the cutting questions from her family and old friends started. "I guess you're up next, huh Abigail?" "When are we going to see you walk down the aisle?" "Are you even dating anyone?"

Abby silently screamed inside every time someone came up to speak with her. Apparently at weddings, marital status was the only thing on anybody's mind. She would try and casually shift conversations towards her work, her recent publications, and the numerous evil men she had helped incarcerate recently. People, however, politely wandered off rather quickly when she tried to bring up such things. She ended up very buzzed, describing in great detail the chemical process of breaking down DNA to enamored fourteen year-old boy.

Feeling pensive, it was on the drive home the next day that she began considering what she really wanted in a husband. A man she would even consider pledging herself too. He would of course have to be cute, caring, smart, and strong. Someone loyal and who would be a good father, but also fun and adventurous.

Much to her chagrin, as she contemplated what she wanted in a man, one face kept floating to the surface of her mind. When she first dated him, he was younger. But since he had been at NCIS, he had blossomed from a bumbling, naive young man, into a strong confident agent. "Who still sometimes bumbled," she amended, but smiled to herself.

He challenged her intellectually and understood what she was saying (most of the time). And sure he was geeky, but she loved that about him. He was a faithful friend, compassionate, a gentleman, so many things. She found herself waxing on about him, mentally. A strange emotion surfaced in her heart.

"Oh goodness, no!" Abby thought, "Not him!" Of all the guys to like, why him? Their muddled past and current working relationship certainly did not lend itself to simplicity. How could she even begin to tell him? What if he did not feel the same way?

She stared out into the vast sky that spread out before her. She loved the night. Everything seemed much more quiet and simple, especially juxtaposed to the turmoil she felt in her heart. She considered the man who she had cared about for more years than any other who had come and gone out of her life.

"I think I might love Mcgee," Abby said the words out loud in the solitude of her car. Their weight fell heavily in the silence

**Monday Morning**

McGee walked into Abby's lab, a Caf-Pow and an evidence box in tow. He was struck the familiar bouquet of chemicals that was always heavy in the room.

He found Abby hunched over her computer, typing. Her loud music throbbed throughout the lab. A typical Monday.

"Hey Abby," McGee shouted over the music, "Caf-Pow! Evidence from the drug bust!" He set down the box on the lab table, and placed the Caf-Pow in front of her.

"Oh! Huh?" Abby exclaimed. She turned around, saw McGee, and for a brief moment pain flashed in her eyes. She turned down the music, but began typing again. "Hey McGee," she said, in a somber tone. Her shoulders were hunched, and she made no more effort to look at McGee again.

"Is anything wrong, Abs?" McGee asked. He moved closer to her, trying to force her to look at him.

"No," she said determinedly. But still, her eyes remained fixed on her computer screen.

On a hunch, McGee asked, "How was your brother's wedding this weekend? How was it being back home with all your family?"

Abby sighed deeply. And slowly she turned to face McGee. "It was wonderful," she said, but her voice was monotone, and her face remain fixed.

McGee gave her an incredulous look. "Abby?"

"It really was wonderful McGee," her voice sounded more upbeat. "I love my family, and I hardly ever get to see them. And my brother and his new wife looked so happy…" she trailed off.

"But," McGee asked, unconsciously moving a step closer to her.

"But," she sighed again. She stared into his eyes for a moment too long, and for some reason McGee's heart started racing. She finally said, "never mind."

McGee stood there, eyes locked with hers, debating whether to walk away or push her into talking.

After only a brief second she said, "But I am almost thirty and my younger brother just got married." She became more animated as she spoke, " It is strange. My family always supported me. They don't care how I dress. They don't care how I live my life. But all of a sudden, everyone is wondering why I'm not married." Abby paused, and turned away from McGee again.

She began fidgeting with one of the goth dolls she had displayed by her computer, focusing intensely on the toy, smoothing out its outfit. "I guess I realized I never think about the future. I like living in the moment, but I know that I want more out of my life. I realized I have never really thought about…" Abby turned her head to face McGee, "who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with."

There was something about the intensity in Abby's eyes that made McGee falter. Suddenly the close proximity they shared, that usually seemed so benign, became fiercely uncomfortable. An obvious frisson filled the air between them. Abby could smell his cologne and his spearmint toothpaste. McGee could almost taste her cherry lip-gloss. And they stood there, mere inches between them, for a long moment. Their eyes remained locked, neither moving, neither breathing.

It was McGee who finally broke silence. "Well," he said, but his voice was flustered, "you should, uhm, maybe, uh, start thinking about that." He swallowed hard and stepped back about a foot. Abby's face dropped.

"I think I should probably go," he mumbled.

And for what seemed like the thousandth time that morning, Abby sighed deeply. "Thanks for the Caf-Pow, McGee. I will call you when I find something."

McGee muttered something that vaguely sounded like, "bronamagh," and walked out the door.

**McGee's POV**

**Immediately Following**

"What just happened?" asked an incredibly befuddled McGee, to himself. "What could have possibly happened to Abby at that wedding to make her so, so," McGee stopped when he could not think of a word to complete the sentence.

Abby's being upset wasn't unusual. She was passionate, and very outward in her displays of emotion. McGee liked that about her, it seemed honest and he was certainly never confused about how she was really feeling.

He could even understand her bout of depression after a wedding. Sure they were happy occasions, but also a not-too-pleasant reminder for single people that their lives are void of romantic love and commitment.

But that look he had given her. That was what had left McGee floored. And what had she said? She was thinking of who she would spend the rest of her life with. Was he imagining the intensity of her stare? The heat? Did her heart start beating faster? Did adrenaline rush though her veins? Or was it just him?

He was over Abby, he had been for years. Sure there were moments when something sparked between them, when the worked in sync, when they had a good laugh, and he would feel a moment of longing. Those were just residual feelings, he had rationalized. You can't sleep with someone without such complications.

Today, however, what he felt was so intense, he was still reeling. His heart was still beating faster, the passion of the moment still tangible in his skin. She must have felt the same way, right? McGee was certainly no expert on this kind of thing. Certainly she had felt the blazing fervor, the connection.

"Get your head out of the clouds," he chided himself, "it was nothing." Residual feelings, that is all, he reminded himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Sometimes when I am reading FF, I skip through parts of the story that seem to be irrelevant to the overall plot of the story. I assure you that I have edited the background case story to keep my writing as concise and well-paced as possible, and to bring you all a plethora of McAbby-ness. **

**Also, an anonymous reader mentioned to me a discrepancy with Abby's age. According to canon, Abby is in her late 20's. Here is why I find that to be true: **While logic would tells us that a woman with multiple master's degrees, a possible implied doctorate, and at least 7 years work experience, would be far older than late 20's, according to NCIS that is simply not true. This year (season 7) Abby guest-starred on NCIS: LA (episode: Random on Purpose), where she was kidnapped by someone who is quoted as saying, "I saved the white woman in her late 20's spot for you," referring to Abby fitting in his "schedule" of deaths. So as of this year, Abby is still in her late 20's. And for me, canon trumps logic. Pauley Perrette (the actress who plays Abby) is actually 41, btw.

**And on to the story!**

**Tuesday**

Abby had spent the rest of Monday analyzing blood, chemicals, and gum wrappers that were found at the crime scene from the drug bust. She didn't get around to poking through the computer until Tuesday morning. It was a low priority, considering they had caught the petty officer in the middle of a drug sale, so any further incriminating evidence was like a cherry on top. Abby's analysis was for protocol purposes only.

"What have we here?" Abby exclaimed to herself, as she was delving into the hard drive. She immediately turned around, because as always, Gibbs walked in the door, and with him, a delicious, delicious Caf-Pow.

"How did you know, Gibbs?" Abby asked excitedly.

"How did I know what, Abs?" Gibbs asked.

"That I found something, of course!" Abby said.

"I was just bringing you your Caf-Pow. What have we got?"

"It's a heavily encrypted file on the petty officer's computer. It looks shady. What did the guy do anyways?" Abby asked.

"He was a computer programmer for one of the Navy's security systems," said Gibbs.

"Ah! That explains a lot." Abby said, emphatically. "I have checked out the file encryption, and it could take weeks to crack."

"Do you think it could be Navy secrets? Maybe drugs weren't the only thing he was selling," Gibbs said, his brow furrowed in concern.

"I don't know. It's definitely hinky. I will get right on it, Gibbs. Just keep the Caf-Pows coming!" Abby said, a tenacious look on her face.

Gibbs smiled. "I'll have McGee bring you one when he comes down to help. I need you two to crack this as soon as possible." He went to walk out the door.

"Oh," Abby hesitated. "Fine," she said in an almost childish way.

Gibbs was almost out the door when he turned around "Is something wrong between you and McGee, Abs?"

"No," Abby said, stiffly.

Gibbs gave her a knowing look. "Then get to work," he said and walked out the door.

**Later on Tuesday**

McGee got off the elevator and stood outside Abby's lab. He hesitated in walking in, and paced in front of her door.

"I can hear you out there McGee," Abby yelled.

"I know," McGee said as he walked in the lab He handed her a fresh Caf-Pow and said, "Listen Abby, I don't know what happened to me yesterday, but I wanted to apologize. I guess I thought," McGee stepped closer to her, unconsciously, as the same feelings he had yesterday washed over him again.

Abby turned away from her computer and faced him. "Yeah?" she asked in a hopeful tone.

"Nothing. I guess I didn't get enough sleep over weekend. I really am sorry I left you when you were in such a bad mood. Are you okay, now?" McGee pulled up a stool and sat next to her. He was close enough to know she smelled like incense.

"I'm fine McGee," she said and paused. "Thank for asking." Abby looked like her mind was a million miles away.

"Shall we get started?" McGee asked.

"Let's do it!" Abby agreed.

To an outside observed walking into the lab, nothing seemed any different between the dynamic duo. Certainly Gibbs did not, the few times he had popped in to the lab to urge them in their labors and provide caffeine reinforcements. And Tony and Ziva had not sensed that this day was different than any other, when they brought their lab-bound friends a pizza (half extra-olives, half pineapple and ham).

And it almost was a normal day. The thumping beat of hard rock filled the otherwise silent lab. The two sat, wordlessly typing, occasionally blurting out what they had found. But it was the little differences that day that made Abby forget to breath sometimes, and McGee to blush for no apparent reason.

Like the moment Abby was waiting for a file to download, she found her eyes wandering towards her co-worker. He noticed her eyes focused in his direction, but when he turned his head he found that she had become extremely interested her painted-black fingernails, crimson flushed her pale cheeks.

And Abby had often stood behind McGee and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, so she could show him something on the computer he was using. But today, as she was showing him her progress, her hands lingered on his longer than they needed to, and he forgot to speak as she pressed herself against him.

And there was the moment when McGee finally cracked the password, in the excitement he accidentally pushed his wireless mouse off the desk. Without thinking, he jumped to get it, and pushed his hand between Abby's knees to grab the mouse from the floor. It was only then that he realized the very compromising position he was in. "I am so sorry, Abs," he said, sheepishly, pulling is arm back at fast as he possibly could.

She pressed his hand against her knee. There was a hitch in his breath. She locked eyes with him said, "It's okay McGee."

The tension in the room was gathering with every passing moment, as if the smallest spark would ignite something.

It was McGee who noticed the time. "Abby, it 11:14, and we aren't even close."

"I know," she said dejectedly.

"We have been in the lab for 14 hours. Let's go, get some sleep, and get started on this thing in the morning." he said, and went to put on his coat.

"Alright, McGee." she said. "Let me get my coat, and we can go."

"Here, I've got it," said McGee, and walked towards her, and then behind her. She smiled when she realized what he was doing, as he held her coat up for to put her arms in. He gently adjusted the collar. "Shall we go?" he asked.

Abby turned around to face him, and the look in her eye had gone from coy to brazen. That small act of chivalry was that spark.

She pushed him up against the wall. "Tim," she whispered. She moved her face close to his, but she paused, waiting for resistance. The look on Tim's face was shocked, but then calculating. "Tim?" she whispered again, more a question this time.

He slowly reached around her neck and unsnapped her trademark spiked dog-collar, and tossed it on the ground. "This might get in the way," he said, and smiled.

He wrapped his hands around her waist and pulled her forward. It was like a lightning bolt struck a gasoline truck, there was an explosion of passion between them. They kissed deeply, tasting smooth skin and spit. She ran her fingers through his short, soft hair. His fingers wandered across the skin of the small of her back. He ran his hands up her sides. She began to tug off his tie. The thrill, the fire that burned more forcefully with every touch, clouded their minds from any cautionary thoughts.

Abby pulled away to begin unbuttoning his tie. Those few inches of space were all McGee needed to sober up. His face fell and he wiped a smudge of black lipstick off his cheek.

"Abby, I can't do this," he said. He placed his hand on her shoulder, pain spread across his face, and he walked out of the lab

Abby stood there, make-up smudged, and hair disheveled. A moment passed, and tears began to gather in her eyes. "I did this wrong," she said quietly, but it still echoed in her lab.

**Abby's POV**

**Immediately Following **

As she stood there in the lab, Abby tried to wrap her mind around how her day had gone from so good to so bad. She had woken up this morning wanting to talk things out with McGee. She was going to invite him to dinner, and discuss re-kindling their relationship, given her newfound desires for the future. If he had said "yes," it would have been wonderful. But if he had said "no," she would have the closure she needed to start seriously searching for another possible soul mate. The whole process would have been relatively pain-free. She had been so rational this morning.

But when McGee walked in to her lab this morning something visceral had washed over her. He was so cute and so sweet and he had been so loyal to her. How had she not seen it before? Why was the realization so jarring?

She thought he had felt it, too. At first it was small things. He sat closer to her than he usually did. She found herself stealing sideways glances at him, to drink in his features. She had never really notice how piercing his eyes were or how soft his lips looked. And as the morning had worn on, there were moments where she could feel the weight of his stare. It had only escalated from there. You did not need a doctorate in chemistry to tell that something had been brewing between them. Had the one small look they shared yesterday changed something? To be fair, she had done most of the flirting, though he did not complain. It is strange how change of heart can so easily flux to change of actions.

It was then that realization stabbed her in the gut. "_I_ did most of the flirting," she said aloud. She groaned as she grasped how audacious she had been in her actions. Maybe he was just being polite, and she had been a total fool. Maybe she had misread everything. Maybe she had completely ruined their friendship because she had misread all the signs!

She walked to her back office and found Bert. She sat down in her chair and hugged him. "I really messed this up, Bert." she said to her stuffed animal friend. He farted concernedly.

She sifted through the events of the day. "In my defense, he certainly did his share of coquetting, today!" Abby thought. He had pressed his elbow against hers as they worked. He had checked her out every chance he was able. And he kissed her back. "Oh boy did he kiss me back!" she thought.

McGee could have stopped her with a word at any time. Of course, in the end, he did stop her. And walked away.

**A/N: Ahh! What was McGee thinking walking out on all that goodness? I do apologize for the pseudo-cliff-hanger. I promise to have the next chaptered edited and posted by Thursday morning between 2am and 4am (I keep a rather vampiric sleeping schedule). Until then, have a splendid and most satisfying day. **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:**

**I find that I need to apologize for my lack of accurate technological terms. I don't know a RAM from a megabyte, and I am sure that is reflected in my writing. Luckily, it is merely the plot vehicle for the important story.**

**Okay, so I don't want to peg myself as an author desperate for comments. However, I have had literally hundreds of hits and dozens upon dozens of "alerts" and "favorites." And only 8 reviews! Bah! (I wonder to myself, are people not reviewing b/c it is awful or they are just busy?)**

**So I would like to say that I sincerely appreciate any comments at all, and especially those which mention a favorite part or line. **

**That being said, I have thus far forgotten to express my gratitude to all those who have taken the time to read my work. Thank you (yes, you!) so much for making this effort read this piece of fiction, which if I have done it properly, is a small part of myself. **

**Whether positively or negatively, my desire is that when you finish reading my piece you are affected in some way. **

**McGee's POV**

**Tuesday Night**

McGee had darted out of the lab and out of NCIS in an incredible hurry. He was grateful that it had been late, and that he didn't run into anyone he knew. He had certainly not been in any state of mind to explain his ruffled appearance.

As he drove home he couldn't stop reliving the moments of that day, the touches and the glances that had led up to that kiss. He could still taste the artificial cherry-flavor that had been on her lips. The feel of her skin lingered on his fingertips.

It was not until he got home that frustration and traces of shame settled in. Part of him knew that if he had stayed a moment later, he wouldn't have been able to stop. But he knew that he had crushed Abby, and he should have at least explained to her why he was leaving. He could only imagine how awful she felt. A knot in his stomach formed when he realized how stupid he had really been. All he had been thinking of when he left was, "This needs to stop."

Abby was the most beautiful woman he had ever met. She was smart and kind and wild. And once upon a time he had thought that their relationship could have been something strong, vibrant, and lasting. But then she had ended things.

Most men (Tony amongst them), would have slapped him silly for walking away from such a moment. But he had been hurt by their break-up before, and he couldn't even imagine if they broke up now. She was one of his best friends, his favorite co-worker, and he would never ever want to ruin what they had. The kiss was bad enough, and the further they had gone, the more difficult it would for them to maintain their friendship.

Okay, he certainly can't say that he was an innocent bystander in this whole affair. He had flirted back. Allowed his eyes to noticeably wander towards her. He had encouraged her in every way. Why? Maybe he had a little more than residual feelings for her. They connected in so many ways, and today he had become enamored by those moments, drunk with longing. He hadn't been thinking straight. He hadn't wanted to think straight.

What could have possibly happened to Abby, that she was acting this way? McGee clearly had no issues following suit, but she had been the instigator. But why? They had worked together for years. What happened at that wedding?

There was a part of McGee that would gladly started dating Abby again. But there was also the part of him that wanted children and a family, and a relationship that had a future. Abby was not interested in thinking about future-things. Strange how the are compatible on so many levels, and one discrepancy ruins the whole thing. And for a short moment McGee wished he didn't care about those things or that Abby did, and that he could be holding Abby on the lab floor instead of sitting on his couch, alone.

He remembered that she was alone now, too. "I'm such a jerk," McGee thought. "How could I have just walked away?" He briefly considered calling her, but any conversation that would stem from his apology would need to be face-to-face. He would talk to her tomorrow. Maybe things would seem less awful in the morning.

**Wednesday Morning**

Abby had gotten into the lab early after a fitful night's sleep. She sat at her computer, typing away furiously, pouring all her energy into break the encryption.

It was late morning when Gibbs came into the lab, pulling McGee by his ear.

"OwOwOwOwOw," McGee cried.

Gibbs let go of McGee. Abby crossed her arms, clearly perturbed at the visitor Gibbs had dragged in.

"Which one of you is going to tell me why McGee refused a direct order to come down here and work?' barked Gibbs.

McGee shifted nervously and Abby remained motionless, her arms still crossed.

"I am only going to ask this one more time. What is going on here?" Gibbs demanded.

Again there was silence. Finally McGee said, "Abby and I are having some non-work related issues."

"What kind of non-work related issues, McGee?" Gibbs stared forcefully at McGee.

"The personal kind, sir," McGee said. He prepared himself to be interrogated further. A look of surprise flashed across Abby's face.

Gibbs sighed. "I don't really care what is going on between you two. What I do care about is that we have a petty officer who is refusing to talk and a file that may or may not contain secrets pertinent to national security. The two of you are not leaving this lab until you know what is in that file. Is that understood?"

"Yes, sir," McGee said.

"Abby?" Gibbs said, a bit more softly.

"Yes, sir," Abby said, but she pouted.

Gibbs walked out of the room leaving bitterness and resentment in his wake.

Abby glared at McGee with venom in her eyes. She turned off her music and put a pair of headphones on. And she went back to her work.

McGee walked up to her, and tapped her on the shoulder.

Abby turned towards him, removed her headphones. "What do you want, McGee?" she spit.

"We need to talk, Abby," McGee said.

"We need to figure out if the Navy's security system had been compromised. You heard what Gibbs said. The sooner we get this done, the sooner you can leave."

"I know I deserve that," McGee said.

Abby faltered for a moment, surprised at his admission of guilt. She hadn't been sure what he was feeling. But still she responded, "I just want to work."

McGee nodded somberly. "Okay, then. How far have you gotten?"

And so the spent the day staring at their respective screens. If you were to watch them you might catch the subtle differences. You may notice that McGee sat as far away from Abby as the desk they shared would allow. And that instead of music pouring from the speakers, the two listened to their individual MP3 players. You may hear the stiff, overly-formal speech they used to communicate and share ideas. And that everything that McGee suggested was wrong. Coincidentally, everything Abby suggested was wrong, also.

If you had described the room's atmosphere from the day before as thick with heat and lust, then today you would most certainly note the disenchantment and icy resentment that chilled the air.

And the day wore on in long bouts of silence, punctuated only by the occasional spat that left them both freshly seething.

But finally, late afternoon, the two shouted in unison, "we got it!" And their eyes met, and they smiled, for a brief moment, before returning to their glowering.

"Well, at least it is good news, mostly" Abby said, making eye contact with McGee for the first time all day. "I'll call Gibbs."

"I'm already here," Gibbs said, walking in the door. "What did you guys find?"

"Well the good news is that our drug-dealer was only involved in drug-dealing. This file is actually his client list," Abby said.

"He actually kept impeccable records of all his sales, which will be very incriminating. The bad news is, the list itself," McGee said.

"There are the names of several senators, congressman, and a few other really important men on this list, Gibbs. That's the bad, news," Abby said.

"Good work. Both of you," Gibbs said. He turned to walk away, but paused. "You two make a very good team," he said, and walked out the door.

"McGee?" Gibbs called from the hallway.

"Yeah, boss?" asked McGee.

"You're with me. We have a lot of work to do," said Gibbs.

"One second, boss," said McGee.

"Hurry up," said Gibbs, and the sound of the elevator doors closing could be heard.

McGee stepped closer to Abby than he had all day. "Listen, Abby, please can we talk. I don't want to loose your friendship over this," he said, with desperation in his voice.

Abby's face softened. "Fine. I'll be here till late, anyways."

McGee went to hug her, but he stopped himself. "Thank you, Abby."

And McGee left the lab.

**A/N: Stayed tuned for the chilling conclusion, which shall be posted in the next couple days. **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: So here it is! The last chapter (wait for applause). **

**I really prefer writing one-shots that are detail-heavy and kind of profound, so this was a new experience for me. I really don't like writing stuff that is out of canon, either. It feels like I am cheating on the show. But there just isn't enough McAbby fic out there (though what is out there is v. good). **

**I have a bug in my ear to write another McAbby fic, where there is an established relationship that they try to hide from their co-workers. And of course, hilarious antics ensue. My writing nature is to usually leave the reader a bit depressed at the end, but I suppose I need to branch out. I will keep you posted.**

**I hope that the conclusion leaves you satisfied and crossing your fingers that McGee and Abby do get together on the show. And once again, may I express my deep gratitude to you (yes, you!) for taking time to appreciate the work that I have created.**

**3 Alice Sarina**

**Abby's POV**

**After McGee left**

Abby had felt shame and misery as she lay in her bed. But when day had broken, all that was left was anger. She certainly had no desire to spend another day stuck in a room with McGee, working less than a foot away from him. Then Gibbs had practically dragged him in, and what could she do?

She had been grateful that he had stood up to Gibbs. She might be mad at McGee for walking away from the kiss, but it had been both their faults it had happened in the first place. She'd really rather Gibbs not know that they had gotten to second base in the middle of her lab.

And maybe McGee was sorry for what he had done, though he didn't explicitly say that. She hadn't wanted him to feel guilty, and the fact that he did make her even angrier. He was supposed to feel happy that they kissed, not guilty.

Usually Abby loved having McGee for company; he was one of the only people at NCIS that she could talk to without having to simplify every sentence. But today had felt agonizingly long. The minutes became viscous, oozing by slowly. She hated that recollections from the day before that kept popping into her head when she was trying to concentrate. Again, this only made her angrier.

She knew she would get over these feelings eventually. She knew that there would be a few awkward weeks, maybe a few awkward months, but they would eventually be friends again. That is one of the things she loved about McGee, that he would never stop being her friend.

But right now her heart felt heavy, and it was of little comfort to her to know that eventually this feeling would go away. Because over the past few days she had allowed herself to imagine what it would be like to have McGee forever, to wake up in the same bed (or coffin, if he would compromise), making breakfast together on Sundays, maybe even starting a family some day. How had she pinned so many hopes on something so tentative? The heart is a dastardly thing.

Loathing teemed through her blood. She wanted to yell at McGee. To tell him what a jerk he had been, how awful, selfish, and cruel. In the end, though, he still didn't want her. There was nothing that could make the impending conversation any easier.

**Later on Wednesday**

Afternoon turned to evening, and evening to night as Abby sat, typing away in her back office. Paperwork was the least-glamorous part of her job. But it was one of those necessary evils, so there Abby sat, pouring herself into the minute details.

It was past nine o'clock when Abby heard Mcgee walk in. Both felt a surge of dread.

"I'm back here," she yelled.

He walked in to her office cautiously, and sat down in the chair across from her, the desk between them.

"What a night," he began casually. "Apparently we have discovered the most significant drug source in all of D.C. There are a lot of ruffled feathers, right now," he said emphatically, avoiding eye contact with her.

"McGee!" Abby demanded.

"Sorry," McGee said. "I was trying to, well, never mind. Look," he paused and shifted in chair. "Last night was great, I mean, that is to say, before," McGee paused. This wasn't going well.

Abby frowned and her tears glistened in her eyes.

"I was an idiot, Abby. I kissed you, and I shouldn't have. It was wrong and stupid and selfish of me. And I'm sorry."

Abby crossed her arms across her chest, "but I wanted you to kiss me," she said in a whisper.

McGee finally looked into her eyes. "I know, Abby. And I wanted it, too."

"You did? But then why did you leave? Why did you just walk out on without any reason in the middle of, you know. We were going to…" Abby's voice began to tremble with anger.

McGee cringed as he saw the effects of yesterday's rash actions . "I know, Abs. I know. And it took every ounce I strength I had in me to walk away. I just, I though it was for the best, for both of us. I knew it was stupid to kiss you, to get close to you in that way." McGee said.

"But why, McGee?" Abby asked, her fists balled up. "Why is it for the best? Why was it stupid to," she faltered.

McGee put his hand on hers. The familiar shock of skin to skin contact surged through both of them.

"I don't know what has happened that you have feelings for me again. I guess it doesn't matter. You don't do long-term relationships. And that's fine. But you know that's what I want. I just can't bear to be with you again, and then eventually break-up. You are one of my best friends, and I don't want to ruin that," McGee said.

Abby looked stunned. "So," she paused. "If someday I thought that maybe we could start a serious relationship, you would maybe want that, too?"

"Wait a minute," McGee said, realization dawning on his face. "The other day, when you said you were thinking of who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, were you talking about…" he trailed off, not wanting to say the word.

Abby half-smiled and nodded.

"Ohhhhhhh!," McGee exclaimed, and leaned in closer to her. "You were serious? You really think you are ready?"

"I dunno, McGee," Abby placed her other hand on top of McGee's. "But I really like the man you've become. I think maybe I want to try. Maybe with you."

"Abby, I didn't even realize until yesterday how intense my feelings for you still are. I would have never realized unless you had been so, well, you" he smiled as he thought about Abby's seduction. "I can't believe I am saying this, but yeah, Abby. I want to maybe try, too."

"Do you think it will work out?" she asked.

His face grew serious. "I don't know . But let's try, okay?"

Abby's shoulders relaxed as the stress she had been carrying finally eased. She stood, and so did he. She grabbed his tie and pulled him close. He wrapped his arms around her neck. When his lips were inches from hers, she paused.

"Will you dress up with me? You know, with black, and skulls, and chains. And come to concerts with me?"

"Abby!" McGee exclaimed, a bit frustrated at her attempt at deal-making when he was that close to her skin.

"McGee! You dress up as an elf and play games with full-grown men," Abby alleged.

McGee smiled widely. "Yeah alright, I will. But I'll complain the whole time. And only if you dress up as my elf princess sometimes, and play Dungeons and Dragons with me."

Abby laughed. "Fine," she said, "but I'll complain."

And for a moment they stood their, unmoving, eyes locked and matching smiles. He ran his fingers through one of her pony tails. She put her hand on his face. And they kissed under the glow of the fluorescent lighting.

**McGee's POV**

**Later that Night**

McGee is excited and a little bit scared for the future. Abby is like a star, exciting and full of passion, and having her in his life will certainly make it brighter and more vibrant. And he can be strong for her, listen to her, and defend her, when she needs it.

But if there is anything he has learned during his years at NCIS, it's that nothing is certain. Life is messy. He sees murder, adultery, hate, and lies every day. And being exposed to the underbelly of humanity can be wearing. He learned a long time ago that there is no such thing as happily ever after.

But he is realizing that there can be happiness for right now. And right now he is happier than he ever thought he could be, as he lies in his bed staring at the pale beauty curled up next to him. And there is a part of him that wants to go out and save the world, so that more people could feel how he feels in this moment.

**A/N: Because I am apparently far more desperate for the admiration of anonymous (but fabulous) internet people than is healthy, please review. Even if that review is: "This is the worst piece of prose I have ever had the misfortune of reading. I read it from beginning to end merely because, like a plane crash, it was so awful I could not look away. Your hands should be cut off to prevent you from ever typing again, and your eyes gouged out for good measure." **


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